Gift
Running on Wings
(Finding Grace at "Station Ten" in Boot Camp)
Click for meditationRegarding "Running on Wings"
Some years ago, I
Injured my right leg and ankle.
I had always been athletic, and loved
Playing sports, so when I
Lost the ability to
Run, fully run, it was a
Big loss to me. I missed the
Freedom to exert myself at a very
High level, and I realized I
Had to change my approach, or
My health would deteriorate. And
So I started to concentrate on
What I could do rather
Than what I couldn’t do,
And I discovered I could
Compensate for my lack of
Mobility in other ways.
I added swimming to
My exercise regimen, then
Weight training, stationary bike
Riding, and many other things.
I eventually began to take
Physical fitness classes.
This lead to one class called,
“Boot Camp,” in which
I was subjected to
A wide set of activities,
One being to run between
Two fluorescent-orange, floor cones.
When I first attempted this,
It was very difficult,
Because I ran with a limp. But
I kept trying, and my limp
Became less, and I finally reached the
Point of being able to slowly jog –
And I felt like my feet
Had wings, eagle’s wings, and
It was as if my body was
Lifted off the litter to soar…
Leo Carroll
November 7, 2018
I find myself running on feet
As if they were surely eagle-winged,
When I once thought I would
Ne’er run again, until, that is, my
Healing would come when I walked
Those tall, sweet grasses in the
Fair meadows of Elysium…
But here I am now, my gait
Restored to where I can at least
Meekly jog, and so I race back and
Forth between two fluorescent cones, as
If my feet were finally loosed of the earthen
Cords which kept them bound…
Savasana in Winter
Click for meditationRegarding "Savasana in Winter"
We are a society which relies on
Science and technology to explain things to us, and to
Make easier our lives now and into the future.
In other parts of the world, this is not
Necessarily so much the case, but here in the
United States, science and technology rule
Our daily lives. And so, when things happen
Which are not readily explainable, we are
Perplexed and left looking for answers…
As a simple example, how often is it
That when we are strongly thinking about
Someone that we by chance then
Happen to meet them at a gasoline
Station or while shopping in a
Supermarket, or when a loved one
Comes into our mind who is deceased,
That the next thing we see is their
Favorite bird…? Ordinary things.
Everyday occurrences. And so on and on…
These things to me are mysteries
Which shout out that something
Bigger than we are is at work and is not
Readily explainable, at least as far as
We can understand. About five years ago
I was in an early morning yoga class,
And towards the end of the hour
The yoga instructor asked us to lie
Back onto our mats into savasana pose,
Where we would typically spend
Five to ten minutes in a meditative,
Almost trance-like, relaxing state.
On this particular day, as my mind
Started to relax, it still tangentially clung
Onto something which I had been previously
Thinking about. Then, as I was lying in
My savasana pose, I felt something
Lightly nudge my extended right hand.
The gentle contact got my attention,
And then I felt it again…and
Again…and so I slightly raised my
Head to peek, and there snuggling
Next to my hand was a little red
Medicine ball. Where it came from I
Do not know! The yoga class had
Not been using these, but somehow
This little red ball had probably rolled out of the
Classroom closet and crept across the
Hardwood floor and found me, and started
Touching me, not just once but multiple
Times, in a comforting, consoling way.
It was as if my flesh was being
Tended to by an inanimate object!
And strangely, I immediately sensed that
What I had been thinking about
Was going to be okay…
Leo Carroll
March 7, 2019
I felt it on my right hand,
A touch, a very light, imperceptible
Touch, an almost tender form of
Intimate communication and connection
And unexpected affection — when
I was otherwise immersed
In the midst of settling slowly
Into my meditation, and waiting up’n
A trance to relieve my mind —
I felt it, and then again, and
So I raised my head slightly from
My yoga mat to take a discreet,
Quick peek, and there,
Behold, nudging me with soft
Persistence and love was a
Small, red medicine ball,
Six inches in diameter, which
Had somehow rolled itself across the
Infinite expanse of the universe,
And was now reminding me
I was not alone, and any earthen
Concern was fleeting when
Before Creation’s power
Was compared…
Near the Quicksand Swamp
Click for meditationRegarding "Near the Quicksand Swamp"
One afternoon,
On a surprisingly balmy
Autumn day in the
Woods of Maine,
I laid onto my back,
And on a large, flat stone
Just dreamily gazed
Up at the tops of
Pine trees which were
Lightly swaying and
Letting loose
Their needles in
A wondrous display.
It was incredibly
Peaceful. A shower
Of pine needles was landing
Atop and all around
Me, and it was
As if I was receiving a
Genuine blessing
From the hand
Of Mother Nature,
Freely given and
In its gentleness
Amazing…and then
It passed…left…as if a
Wand had mysteriously
Crossed over me,
And my understanding
Of what the woods
Was speaking faded —
Behind a veil to
Someday be parted,
When I rest again
So easily…
Leo Carroll
June 21, 2018
For one brief moment, I
Felt I understood the woods. It came when a
Little breeze blew, and I saw pine
Trees their shoulders shrug
And their needles let loose…and then it
Was gone, my understanding
Fleeting like the precious breeze…
And I was left staring up at
Floating pine needles – but their descent
Again a forest mystery.
Ode to ‘Reading Room’
Click for meditationRegarding "Ode to ‘Reading Room’"
How I love my time
Spent in the woods of Maine!
At one point in my life, I went up
There for twenty one straight years every
November, and in all my
Life I have never found a more
Consistently peaceful place to
Contemplate and write. Every sight and
Sound in the woods had
Meaning to me, and I had a
Wide variety of names to refer to
Some of my favorite spots –
For example, the “Reading Room,”
The “Field”, and the “Trap Line” were
Three locations I regularly
Visited. Each had a natural niche
For me to settle into, and to
Wonder and daydream.
I wrote hundreds of poems
While up there. I would just sit in
Silence. The “Reading Room”
Became my best-liked, and
I would often end my day
There as the late afternoon
Light took over the woods.
Invariably at a certain point,
I would hear the melancholic
Barking of a dog coming from
The pasture of a distant, white
Farmhouse. The sound would waft
Across the tops of the trees,
And I would be reminded
Of something in my past which
Was comfortable and I called “home.”
And so, even now when I no longer
Go up to those beloved Maine
Woods, I will daydream
Of the many walks which
I took to find my resting place
In the “Reading Room.”
In the case of the poem for
Which this meditation is
Written, I was daydreaming
One January day of what
The path I walked would look
Like if there were no footprints in
The snow, and if the “Reading Room”
Was all alone watching what
I would have been watching, but
Sadly there was no one there
Now to call the barking
Dog home …
Leo Carroll
February 25, 2019
No footsteps in the snow
Lead up to you today,
No flesh cold sits upon your
Ledge, no mind wanders and then
Wonders at every sight and sound, and no
Melancholy rises up in the throat
When bays a dog across the
Primeval expanse between you
And a lone, white farmhouse –
Which even now from here,
Lo all these hundreds of miles away,
I can still see gleaming like a
Shining beacon across the tree tops
In my daydream’s gaze.
Slate-Colored Juncos
Click for meditationRegarding "Slate-Colored Juncos"
One long ago
Winter day, a mix of
Grey and overcast and my
Mood the same,
I was peering out my
Window at one of my
Rock gardens, and
As I was doing this,
I noticed the barest
Of movement
In the curled-up,
Dormant grass.
I thought at first it
Was a single bird, but I
Soon realized it was
A tiny flock of
Small, blue-grey
Birds, sparrow size
Maybe, but birds
Which I had not
Noticed in my garden
Before. They kept
Inching their
Way closer to my
House, and their heads
Were vigorously
Bobbing as they
Pecked away
At some invisible
Source of nutrient.
Before I knew
It, they reached
The foundation of
My house and were
Right below the very window
I was looking out, and
Finding sustenance,
Where 30 minutes before
I had thought all was
Cold and grey!
Leo Carroll
January 29, 2019
Little blue-grey
Birds inch their way
Towards my house,
Their beaks to the ground,
Their hope to fill
Their mouths.
Their color seems
To be of the sea’s winter
Sheen – cold and
Hard – but I believe
Their tiny beaks feed a
Gentle breed.